The Quirky Life of P

Humor and satire revolving around Mr P- a fictional mix of an avatar of Mr Bean and the veritable Bertram Wooster of Wodehouse fame.

Things go wrong for Mr P on the yoga mat!


shavaasana-copy

Mr P could go on and on about the merits of yoga. Like most yogis, he also liked talking about the goodness of being a vegetarian. Yet P was a vegetarian only when there was no non vegetarian food available. Slightly misquoting the original saying P justified that though he craved to be a vegetarian, “the spirit was willing, but  flesh made him weak!!!” .

Anyway, coming back to the topic of yoga, Mr P had a yoga certificate under his belt. The Yoga Shiromani certificate gave him the eligibility to teach yoga.  After obtaining the qualification, Mr P practised yoga once in a while whenever he noticed that his waist line was expanding much faster than the progression of his spirit. The Asana that Mr P liked best was Shavasana or the corpse posture, where one lies flat on the back with arms and legs stretched and relaxing with the eyes closed. But mat time often became nap time for Mr P. He would wake up finally and look at his watch to see that he had spent at least two hours doing yoga… But the girth of his waist never seemed to decrease!

When he thought about it more, P realised that perhaps he would be able to do more active yoga if he did it in a group rather than all alone by himself. P then hit on the brilliant idea of starting a yoga class. He believed that if he taught yoga, he would be doing all the postures with the students rather than snoozing off. So Mr P spread the word around and soon had a class started. There were five students on the first day. Mr P started with his favorite posture – the Shavasana. He demonstrated it for his students.

Lying flat on his back on the yoga mat spread on the floor he began with “Relax your toes.”

More than any yoga stretches, what Mr P was really good at stretching, was the word “relax“. He felt that stretching it out helped people unwind more.

So he said “Relaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax your toes!”

“Relaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax your feet,” came after a long pause.

“Relaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax your thighs” followed after awhile.

Relaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaxing the stomach, chest, hands, neck and so on he went upwards, slowly, in a gentle, sombre voice……

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

When finally Mr P opened his eyes, he saw that his students were sitting up politely waiting for him to wake up. Someone even commented on Mr P’s noisy snoring.

 

In the next class as well, Mr P started with his favourite Shavasana posture. Relaxing, he slept off as usual because …… he was all by himself on the yoga mat once again!

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4 thoughts on “Things go wrong for Mr P on the yoga mat!

  1. That sleeping thing is the reason a lot of people don’t stick with yoga: relaaaaax, and they do!

    Like

  2. Very interesting!

    Like

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